F*ck, f*ck, f*ck a duck…
With her favorite dirty ditty playing through her mind, Mia’s shocked to see that her fine feathered friend has turned into a hard-bodied hunk worth quacking over. What the hell is she supposed to do now? Good thing he’s got an idea… or four.
“Well, H-man, today’s the day.” Mia reached for the self-adhesive gauze and began carefully peeling the material away. Poor little duck.
She’d watched in horror as a car struck the little guy in the parking lot of her apartment building. Without a second thought, she scooped him into her arms, deposited him in her car and raced to the nearest animal hospital. The doctor had argued that Howard should have been cared for by wildlife professionals, but the guy seemed so attached to her already that she wouldn’t release him to anyone else.
Now, two months later, it was time to remove the splint, according to the doc. Actually, the doctor said she could have removed it the week before, but Mia wanted to be extra sure the duck was healed. Truthfully, she hadn’t wanted to release the guy back into the wilds of South Florida just yet.
Howard was a model pet. Better than any cat or dog she’d ever owned growing up in her parents’ home. He did his business on the designated pads, didn’t vomit all over the apartment and didn’t eat his own crap. He truly was the most perfect pet ever.
Her mom told her she couldn’t keep him.
Stroking Howard’s smooth feathers, she released him and watched as he stretched and wiggled his wing. After a few moments of flapping and general “happy duck” behavior, he settled on the bathmat in front of the sink and closed his eyes. Looked like he’d be staying for her bath as always.
Mia hoisted herself from the ground and gingerly slipped into the steaming bathwater. With a sigh, she reclined against the porcelain tub and allowed the warm water to wash away the stress of the day.
Seconds, minutes, hours later, Mia woke with a start. Water splashed over the edge of the tub and she reached for her nose, a tiny tickle dancing on the tip. Face soaked by water, she wiped the remaining droplets from her eyes and opened them to…
Holy shit on a stick with a big dick.
A nude man stood before her, one long dark feather in his hand and a smirk teasing his lips. Oh, those lips. Deep pink and full, her first thought was that she wanted to kiss them and then they could kiss her there. Oh yeah, right there.
No! He was a stranger, in her apartment, nude, and surrounded by… feathers? What?
A small feather drifting to the ground caught her eye and suddenly Mia realized exactly who was missing from her apartment. Anger overrode her fear and she rose from the tub in a large splash and glared into the stranger’s eyes.
“What,” she snatched the feather in his hand and poked him in the chest, “have you done with Howard?”
